I am afraid but regret~

I didnt want to continue my story 2day as I wanted to write these out...

On Feb 13th, he and I have a date as he had promised. At 7pm he came to pick me up, and we headed to Leisure Mall to enjoy my sushi as he had promised months ago... He and I was having fun, and chatted jus like old times, when we were still in high school. I tot after what happened between us, it will make us both very shy to each other but that day really make a difference.

We ate and chatted, and sometimes we joked. We updating each other with the leftout details and most of all, he is rite beside me enjoying it too... We even compete who eat the most, but then I lost because I am so full after all the afternoon meals. =P I even bluffed him that I havent eat bcos I was waiting for this meal. Haha~

After that we went 2 pasar malam and walked all the way to the end and back to our car. He lied to me! I asked him to buy the tamagotchi for me, and he kept said that he forgot to bring it back to Malaysia. When I got in the car, I am looking around but I failed to find it. Then suddenly he bring it out for me. I am so happy~!! Yea~ I am so excited to open it, and I cant wait to go home so I bought a pair of scissors to open it. Hehe~ Childish la me~

I almost felt that we are dating lor... I even stand close to him when walking like what we did last time when we were still in high school. Sometimes I don't realized that I am still holding my breath when I standing near with him. My heart even beated so hard.. (Just like Westlife song "Catch my breath") *smiled widely*

Lastly, we walked back to McDonald and we sat down and open our tamagotchis. So Kawaii~~ new version! Can go to school, go marry la, and built a new generation! I even can go online and play games with other tama~ *glee*

I donno what I felt for him anymore. I found out that I still like him, and too bad it is not same as for other side. Yesterday I cried when I think about it. I asked myself why did I let him go when he told me he like me? Why did I choosed Jimmy Teh instead of him?

I knew the answer......

I don want to hurt him if he really become my bf......
I am afraid that I could not love him anymore later....
I am afraid that I will lose him if we are not a couple anymore....

I just like to keep our relationship simple and easy~ We can be friends 4ever~ *Sad* altot it is not wat I wanted but then it is the best for us both~